When you create a homebrew world, there are nearly infinite details that you can develop. There are of course the obvious ones: the basics of the setting, its historical context, its natural world, the fundamentals of its political world. But there's so much more than that. I think the impulse with homebrew settings is to find ways to adapt modern and historical fact into the fiction of the world, and there's nothing wrong with this. I myself use those kinds of details to characterize a few of my takes on classic D&D groups. My two human groups are pretty directly based on real-life history--the Daltoners are western European in inspiration, specifically a caricatured version of the British Empire, and the Faninites tend to draw from Viking culture, though they're explicitly a lot more peaceful than classic Vikings. Similarly, dwarves are a mixture of Germanic tribes and Roman civilization, and elven society is loosely based on feudal Japanese culture. That lets me keep a pretty traditional high fantasy aesthetic to a lot of the world.
But other elements can take whatever direction you like. My gnomes are technologically-focused as classic D&D calls for, but my take casts them as strictly socialistic and free-thinking; my halflings are anarchistic and focused on nature preservation; my orcs are tribal but also highly spiritual with some borrowings from Egyptian culture, making them a pretty unique mixture of ideas that resists classic D&D characterization--my orcs hold up war as a culturally important thing but prize peace and mutual support in ways that runs counter to most tabletop depictions of them. In a similar way, choosing atypical things to develop in a homebrew setting can set your world apart from the standard depictions of settings. That's why I've chosen idiosyncratic (but still relevant) details to spend time thinking about. A few of the more distinct things I've chosen to characterize are specific societal and cultural aspects of my groups, things like senses of humor, conspiracy theories, parenting styles, and funeral rites.
Details like these may seem trivial at first, but I assure you that there's more to them than meets the eye. Most tabletop game have NPCs that are meant as comic relief, and having distinct senses of humor between cultural groups means a more intricate and diverse approach to those humorous characters. Conspiracy theories tell us about the truth of the world and its misconceptions, which tell us about the ways that people in the homebrew setting interpret the world around them. Parenting styles can define the childhood, adolescence, and adulthood experiences of people, and seeing the ways that different groups define those roles can help to set apart people from different cultural backgrounds in surprising ways. Funeral rites can be an important detail in that death is usually a fairly omnipresent factor in tabletop games, and how people celebrate life and death tells us about their beliefs about the world in addition to really spicing up scenes that involve the loss of a player character or NPC. So with that perspective in mind, let's approach romantic and sexual relationships, which can hold a similarly important role in the ways that different characters get along in the reality of the game.
Daltoners:
In Daltoner culture, the primary purpose of the family unit is to provide the Daltoner Empire with more citizens. As a result, Daltoner society emphasizes the importance of quickly finding a partner, existing as a couple for as long as possible, and creating as many children as possible. The ideal would be characterized as being married by 16 (18 at the latest), having at least three children by 21, and striving to reliably produce more children before one's 30th birthday. Because Daltoners marry so young, most relationships lack the emotional maturity to establish healthy relationships--while Daltoner culture places value on lifelong relationships, there is a greater emphasis on bearing children. As a result, Daltoner relationships tend to last for as long as the couple is able to exist together without completely breaking down, and divorce, while stigmatized, is a fairly common occurrence. So long as the divorced partners quickly remarry and bear children again, there is little actual stigma attached to divorce. Divorces later in life tend to be frowned upon since there's reduced possibility of bearing children, so older couples are expected to stay together regardless of the health of their relationship. (Divorce carries serious and heavy legal ramifications for women, who retain no rights or property after the divorce, so most divorces are initiated by men.)
Since Daltoners' marriages are a formal way of creating families and little more, there is very little emphasis on romantic compatibility in their relationships. More important to Daltoners is the concept of marrying into powerful economic families. Therefore, social and economic status are the primary functions that Daltoners look for in a spouse. As a result, many Daltoners seek to strike it rich as a means to gain a high profile for marriage potential. While the dominant culture demands strictly functional marriage without much attention paid to romantic compatibility, there is a small and widely despised movement amongst the Daltoner youth to choose romantic connection over economic prospects for mates. However, marriage for the prospect of creating large families is still an emphasis among these younger people. It has been observed that these marriages seem to have more long-term success on average, but since marriage age remains very low, the long-term viability of romantic relationships is still not any higher than it is in other cultural groups, as these relationships lack the emotional maturity of more adult thinking. In general, though, romance is largely ignored amongst Daltoners, and there is little mention of it in Daltoner art. Romantic relationships are defined strictly as monogamous and heterosexual, with great shame and judgment placed on any dalliance from that model.
In terms of sexual dynamics in Daltoner culture, there is a strict religiously-based belief that sex for childbearing reasons is morally good and that sex for any other reason is morally wrong. There is especially a cultural belief that sex for pleasure is hedonistic and offensive. As a result of this, romantic relationships tend to involve very codified standards for sex. It is actually not uncommon for Daltoner spouses to report one another to their church leader or even local guard if they believe that their partner is interested in sex for pleasure. A common punishment for this is being publicly displayed in stocks with a sign affixed around the "offender's" neck, reading "sinner," "harlot," "heretic," or similar terms meant to bring shame on the "perpetrator." Further, having sex outside of marriage is considered a massive sin within the Dalton Church of Pelor, the Daltoner's oppressive religious institution. In the past, this was punishable with execution, but that has been softened to a few months in prison since it both dissolved marriages, making childbearing more difficult, and since several highly-ranked Daltoner officials were somewhat recently found guilty of it, at which point they changed the sentencing.
Faninites:
Faninite regard having a family as one of the most important endeavors in life, if not the most important. As a result, creating the foundation for a family is treated with solemn seriousness. Because of this, Faninite relationships tend to be undertaken with earnestness and care, and even fledgling romantic relationships are considered a proving ground for developing a family unit. Faninites discuss childrearing aspirations very early in relationships compared to other cultural groups, often during the early courtship period. Since Faninite relationships are taken so seriously, there is very little in the way of casual dating amongst adults; teens, however, do engage in more casual relationships, and this is viewed as a kind of practice for more adult relationships. When a Faninite relationship fails, there is a complex view of the relationship--Faninite culture regards these failed relationships as honest attempts to build something meaningful, and though there is considerable emotional pain involved in their relationships ending, there is no social judgment associated, as Faninites regard an earnest attempt at a relationship as worthwhile even if it does not result in a family unit.
In terms of romantic relationships, Faninites have a fairly complicated view of the goals they seek together. The primary objective of relationships is to develop a meaningful and reliable system of emotional and social support for both of the Faninites involved with an eye toward raising a family; the secondary goal is to experience the thrill of romantic love. Because romance itself is secondary to Faninite relationships, falling in love with one's partner is seen more as an added bonus than a cardinal objective. Many groups outside of Faninite society perceive these relationships to be more akin to intense friendships than genuine romantic relationships, but Faninites themselves believe this to be an oversimplification; they regard romance as important and do seek to find it in a partner, but at the same time, they tend to think that romance is ever-changing and can be unreliable, which is not a strong foundation on which to build a family. Therefore, a relationship with waning romance is not seen as a negative thing--rather, it is a simple fact of life that need not spell the end of an otherwise beneficial social arrangement. In this sense, Faninite relationships are exceedingly practical. Faninites believe that family units are not limited to parents and even believe that more social support from family is vital (leading to most Faninite families consisting of extended family and family friends), but they do regard the role of a marriage--which is a common and celebrated aspect of their culture--as a bond to be shared between two people. Homosexuality and pansexuality are not uncommon, and they are not treated with especial prejudice nor acceptance.
Sexual relationships within Faninite culture are seen by outsiders to contrast sharply with their romantic beliefs. While romantic and especially parenting relationships are essentially the cornerstone of Faninite society, and are thereby undertaken with great seriousness, sexual relationships are gone about much more casually. There is essentially a divide in Faninite culture between romance and sex--while a pair of partners undertakes a romantic relationship and the building of a family, sex is a much more wide open area. It is common and even celebrated to have multiple sexual partners, including outside of one's marriage, and almost no Faninite thinks of these sexual relationships, which tend to be fairly long-lasting and consistent, as interfering with the emotional bonds of romantic relationships. More than any other group, Faninites encourage their youth to experiment with sex from relatively young ages (beginning in their early teens in most cases, leading to the earliest forms of birth control being developed by Faninites). Developing a healthy sexual connection to someone is seen as both natural and enriching, and there are almost no sexual taboos among Faninites, save for extreme age differences, which are believed to violate the emotional boundaries of people with different levels of maturity. At the same time, there is no pride or honor bestowed on Faninites who take an especially large or small number of partners--Faninites recognize that different people have different relationships with sex and respect that fact without judgment.
Dwarves:
In dwarven society, relationships tend to focus around clan relationships, with the most immediate element being the family unit. However, because dwarves culturally focus on work and trade, much of the family unit is tended to by the mother and extended family. The romantic relationship for dwarves is seen as something of a weakness; a dwarf's primary allegiance is to their clan, and forging a stronger relationship with one's romantic partner than with one's clan is viewed as essentially traitorous. (An exception is the somewhat common practice of marriages within the clan, especially between distant cousins--these relationships are given special treatment as it keeps the romantic relationship within the confines of a clan allegiance.) At the same time, this mild taboo on romantic relationships has resulted historically in a sizable subculture devoted to romance. There is a large part of the dwarven literary community that exclusively depicts intense and fiery romantic relationships as a means of escapist fiction. In many dwarven cities, there are shops which secretly sell romance novels and art. In the last few generations, there has been a growing acceptance among dwarves for romantic art and its fans, but there remains a fairly widespread belief that this is at least vaguely degenerate behavior. Romance remains something that most dwarven relationships do not focus on or even cater to in favor of more familial bonds. Dwarves regard romantic relationships to be monogamous or shameful.
Rather than basing partner relationships on romantic passion, dwarven relationships tend to focus on loyalty. A dwarf shows their partner their affection through acts of service, though the dominant modes of these acts of service tends to be misunderstood by outsiders. Where the Daltoner have strictly gendered roles in marriage (men provide economically and women tend to the home), and dwarves have a similar structure, the reasoning is entirely different. Dwarven men regard work and trades as enriching but exhausting and often dehumanizing, so their commitment to economic output is considered a great act of service that they undertake so that dwarven women can remain in the comfortable sphere of the home. Similarly, dwarven women regard childrearing as highly laborious and emotionally draining, so their commitment to those tasks are seen as a way to spare their husbands. In the last several hundred years, a societal conversation has arisen in regard to these roles that has greatly shifted the dynamics of many dwarven families--after millennia of strictly gendered roles within relationships, many dwarves have voiced a desire to perform the opposite role. This conversation was sparked by an archaeological discovery that indicates that the earliest dwarves placed women in the work sphere and men in the home sphere. This has led to an increasingly popular movement in which dwarven women are undertaking economic work while men tend to the home. The upper echelons of dwarven society are outspokenly opposed to this split with tradition (regardless of the historical evidence), but the change seems to be gaining ever more momentum.
Like romance's taboo reputation but underground popularity, so does does sex have a complicated relationship to dwarven society. Traditionally, dwarves have publicly viewed sexual relationships as strictly functional--for childbearing and nothing else. But at the same time, this taboo has led to a massive secret interest in sex. For thousands of years, dwarves have been among the chief producers of sexual art and literature, although this fact has been obscured by dwarven artists adopting non-dwarven names to protect their identities. In recent generations, this fact has come more to light, leading to a fairly widespread reputation for dwarves to be secretly obsessed with sex. While dwarven society still strictly condemns open admission of sexual relationships, dwarves tend to have very free-spirited sexual relationships behind closed doors. The taboo on romance has generally meant that spousal relationships are devoid of intense sexual relationships, but large communities of dwarves interested in more liberated sexual relationships have formed social clubs that cater to whatever fantasies those involved may have. But the cultural taboo persists in large part, especially in terms of insisting that sex not occur outside of married couples. Homosexuality and pansexuality in romance and sex are treated with cautious acceptance; historically, dwarves mirrored Daltoners' approach, but have become considerably more accepting since the dissolution of the kingdoms led to greater cultural sharing between groups.
Orcs:
Orcish families units, widely misunderstood by outsiders, are primarily focused on supporting children and helping them to survive to adulthood (a daunting task given the dangerous lives orcs lead historically speaking). Children are held up as awe-inspiring potential for a better future, and relationships are judged as flawed if they do not commit fully to supporting that potential. But unlike other groups, childrearing is not a by-far primary goal for relationships. Orcish relationships are intense and varied in ways that outsiders struggle to understand. For one, orcs generally practice polyamorous relationships, which are not widely understood outside of orcish society. Secondly, family units are composed differently--the several or even many partners involved in an orcish relationship are all given direct roles in supporting the family and raising children. And thirdly, due to the multifaceted composition of orcish families, the relationships considered to be parent-child or sibling-sibling would not be viewed by the same rules in other cultural groups. As a result, orcish families tend to be at once looser than other groups' families (consisting of many more family members) and also much tighter (without strict societal rules on what constitutes family, the boundaries on what makes two orcs family are blurred and can include considerably more orcs).
Because orcs very widely believe in the value and efficacy of polyamorous relationships, most orcs tend to view romance as a thing that is not exclusive to a single partner. Within the bounds of orcish society, most romantic relationships tend to involve at least four partners, with many relationships spanning more, and some even consisting of an entire clan unit. This belief is in part fueled by the strong kinship ties in orcish clans; it is also largely based on the belief that one single partner could never meet every emotional need of any other single partner. Due to this belief, insecurity about a romantic connection between a partner and someone else is not an experience common to orcs, and there is even a near stigma on feeling insecure about a bond developing between a partner and someone else--it is viewed as an emotional weakness which speaks to immaturity. From an early age, orcs are encouraged to explore romantic pursuits with as many other people as they feel an urge to do so with, and because there is no taboo on polyamory, very few orcs experience any kind of discomfort with this kind of relationship. It is a rare but not unknown practice for an orc to feel uncomfortable with polyamorous relationships; this largely happens either because a younger orc has formed a strong bond with another and wants to pursue a monogamous relationship or because they feel insecure about their position in a larger polyamorous relationship. The result in either case is usually leaving orcish society at large, and in fact, the first orcs to leave orcish society to join the wider Evanine culture have done so based on these sorts of feelings. As a result, the orcish practice of polyamory was not widely known until much of Evanoch was becoming more united in the last days of the kingdoms.
There is not one unifying conception of sexual relationships in orcish society so much as two dominant ones. Some clans have traditionally viewed sex as something that is connected to a romantic bond, and they generally encourage members of the clan to maintain sexual relationships only with members of the polyamorous relationship. At the same time, other clans have viewed sex as fairly distinct from romance, and these clans have encouraged members to enjoy sexual relationships with anyone regardless of inclusion in a romantic relationship. The common theme in both views is that sex is an essentially religious experience. For orcs, sexual contact is not just pleasure but ecstasy granted by the gods. Therefore, connecting sexual contact to a romantic bond seeks to add a further emotional heightening to the joy of sex, while encouraging sex with anyone the orc feels inclined to share it with is a belief meant to enable the orc the easiest possible access to this religious ecstasy. While this is largely a belief taught by one's clan, the increase of orcs in larger society outside of clans has softened the strictness of these views among orcs. There certainly are those who feel that their view of sex is right and the other wrong, but increasingly, orcs see this as a matter of personal taste. This is yet another element of orcish society misunderstood by outsiders, as it is not common knowledge that there are two distinct approaches within orcish society. Homosexuality and pansexuality are common and accepted parts of orcish society.
Gnomes:
Gnomish family units are rather distinct in that gnomish parents provide necessities to their children but otherwise tend to let the child fend for themselves out of an interest in not forcing them into a lifestyle unwanted by the child. As a result, the emphasis in gnomish families is not in focusing on the child; rather, the benefit to the partners in the relationship takes on a primary significance. Gnomes are hard to lump into one category, and romantic and sexual relationship are no different. Generally, gnomish relationships tend to fall into three categories: (1) a strictly businesslike arrangement, either financial or collaborative in trade, (2) a platonic bond characterized by close friendship, or (3) an intense romantic and sexual bond. For businesslike gnomes, romance and sex are of little import; this is in large part because gnomes are entirely comfortable accepting asexuality and aromanticism in ways that most other groups are not. For platonic gnomes, the dualistic individualistic/community-driven society in which they live can be isolating at times, and a reliable close friend is the kind of thing that can lead to a particularly enriching relationship that at times reaches into genuine romance and sex. And intensely romantic and sexual gnomes follow their passions--while the stereotype of gnomes does not include this kind of passionate behavior, gnomes are among the less socially and emotionally inhibited of Evanoch's population, and gnomish relationships are often some of the most fiery in the land.
One key element of gnomish romances is that there is effectively no prejudice against homosexual and pansexual gnomes. In fact, more than half of all gnomes have at least a few romantic and sexual relationships with partners of the same sex at some point in their lives. Because of stigma from other cultural groups and because gnomes delight in being secretive about gnomish culture, this fact is not widely known outside of gnomish communities, but in reality, gay relationships are exceedingly common amongst gnomes. Going back to the earliest of gnomish art, examples of gay relationships are widespread in all eras of gnomish culture. Gnomes also have a tendency toward having multiple partners, but unlike orcs, these partners are not shared; rather, gnomes choose multiple partners who each satisfy individual facets of their lives. So the categories for relationships above (business, platonic, and romantic/sexual) are not individually exclusive--rather, a gnome tends to have at least one partner of each type. Throughout the ages, gnomes have somewhat jokingly developed the idea of a partner who could satisfy all of a person's needs, but this tends to be view more as a young gnome's naive dream than a practical reality. The intensely practical gnomes generally think of having a romantic partner as an emotional need, and less importance is attached to the long-term viability of a relationship than in the fact that it fulfills a need in the here and now.
Sexual relationships for gnomes are harder to classify than their romantic relationships. It is true that many gnomes identify as asexual and that even more identify as gay or pansexual, and this is such a widely accepted thing that a common joke among gnomes is that strictly heterosexual gnomes are harder to find than a trustworthy Daltoner. Again, gnomes tend to fall into a few different groups of experience with sexual relationships. Some gnomes regard sex as unimportant and a distraction even if they do not identify as asexual; these gnomes largely abstain from sex and view it as completely distinct from romance and friendship. Other gnomes see sex in a similar fashion to Faninites or orcs--they see it as a natural pleasure that should be undertaken fairly casually. And still other gnomes look at sex as a key experience in life which their other pursuits are in service of. The sex lives of these gnomes are not entirely separate from the fantasies of the repressed dwarves. Because gnomish society is so focused on the community's benefit, gnomes recognize that direct conversation about sexuality is both necessary and delicate; without discussion of sex, individual's experiences would go ignored by society at large, but at the same time, respectful and tactful conversations are required to respect the differences between individuals. As a result of this, sexual topics are considered fair game in public spaces, but only when speakers are careful to mind the boundaries of others.
Halflings:
Halflings' rather unique take on childrearing informs a great deal of the halfling family structure. Halfling children are raised solely by their mothers until early childhood ends, at which point the mother ritually abandons the child so that the young halfling can learn to fend for themselves. This means that the family unit is strictly a mother and one child (with one variation; see below), so romantic and sexual relationships take on a very distinct form. Homosexuality and pansexuality is neither uncommon nor faced by prejudice; lesbian couples are particularly held up as socially important and prestigious in halfling culture as they are strictly matriarchal. In general, heterosexual halfling couples and gay halfling couples have very different sorts of relationships in terms of family creation. For heterosexual couples, the halfling man is abandoned when the child is born, and the mother potentially reunites with him after the child is abandoned. Meanwhile, gay halfling men never have children unless they adopt them from unwilling mothers (a practice not unheard of but deeply frowned upon), while lesbian halfling couples raise their child together after one is impregnated. These relationships are almost never understood outside of halfling culture, and halflings tend to be incredibly tight-lipped about the nature of family relationships since they know they will face being misunderstood and judged.
In terms of romantic relationships, since childrearing is a very dividing element of relationships depending on one's sex and sexuality, romance is largely defined by the inherent value of the romance itself. Halfling culture mostly discourages romantic relationships due to its intense focus on self-sufficiency, but there is no strict social enforcement of this attitude. When halflings do engage in romance, the relationships are characteristically very intense but also quite divided; halfling couples almost never live together (a strict taboo that indicates weakness) and are socially forbidden from financially supporting each other. As a result, the only real reason to engage in a romantic relationship is for the sake of the romantic love itself. This means that halfling romances are fiery and passionate; halflings also argue that removing details like financial stress and familial drama from the relationship strengthens them. Further, a halfling romance is almost always preceded by a secretive courtship and months or even years of testing the waters before committing to an earnest relationship. Though not true 100% of the time, the majority of halfling relationships last for life, so the courtship period is something of a proving ground before committing to a partner for life. Marriage does not formally exist in halfling culture, as bonds are considered largely permanent with or without a formal marriage. Since contact between cultural groups, halflings have learned of the system of polyamory from other groups, and a very small portion of halflings have adopted it, but there remains considerable cultural prejudice against the practice.
Sexual relationships among halflings are similarly idiosyncratic. Like the orcs, halflings regard sex as a heightening and almost spiritual experience, though halflings see this as bringing them closer to the natural world rather than the supernatural world as orcs do. But because the prospect of having children is treated with such incredible gravity, casual sex for heterosexual couples did not become a popular part of halfling culture until they developed basic birth control around 2,000 years ago. Prior to that, sex was considered a special indulgence for heterosexual couples. Meanwhile, gay couples have always engaged in sex for pleasure freely, leading most halflings to experiment with sexuality if only for access to casual sex. Like with their romantic relationships, halflings have generally regarded sex as the domain of two people--to them, it is physical extension of the emotional experience of romantic love. However, contact with other groups after the dissolution of the kingdoms introduced the idea of more sexual partners, and this idea has caught on more in halfling society than polyamory has, but still to a limited extent given the general belief that sexual relationships are congruent with romantic ones. Many modern halflings experiment with casual sex at fairly young ages, but since a primary lesson they learn in their youth is the serious duty of childrearing, most of this experimentation is done either in gay relationships or with careful use of birth control.
Elves:
Because elves lead such dramatically long lives, family units tend to change over the course of their lives. It is not uncommon for elves to have no siblings from the same two parents, though this is also not unheard of. Over the course of the thousand years that elves are generally expected to live, they can change a great deal in terms of interests, ways of expressing themselves, and values, and this means that relationships between elves may last for hundreds of years stably and still fade or markedly change. In practice, this means that an elf might have several significant partners over a lifetime, and this is not frowned upon in the slightest. However, entirely cutting a partner out of one's life is reserved for extreme situations only--cases of abuse, treachery, and other major offenses. So rather than an elf saying permanent goodbyes to a partner, the tendency is more often for this partner to become secondary, tertiary, or further relegated to a diminished place in an elf's life as newer, more suitable partners are established. In this regard, elves are largely polyamorous. But unlike the polyamory of the orcs, who tend to regard all partners as either equal or simply different in nature, the elves tend to place relationships in a manner of hierarchy: a primary partner, a secondary partner, and so on. It is considered a socially and emotionally painful experience to be held at a different rank than one's partner places them at, but it is common enough in occurrence that it is more commiserated with than judged by other elves. Due to the regularly changing nature of elven relationships, elves view their bonds with partners as temporary in some sense, but the effect of that is to prize and celebrate those relationships while they last rather than to diminish their importance.
When it comes to primary romantic partners, elves usually view their connection through an intellectual rather than emotional lens. This is not to say romance is unemotional for elves--they do indeed feel these bonds deeply--but the main connection between elven partners is mental. This explains an important reason for changes in primary partners: as an elf gains knowledge in a specific field, takes on a new trade, or develops a new artistic talent, their interests change, and a new partner who can help them develop their interest (through cultivated skill or noteworthy potential, for instance) becomes an attractive prospect. In this way, taking on a new partner is celebrated in elven culture as recognition of becoming established in a field--earning the respect of another elf with notable skill or knowledge is a deeply important experience in elven society. This is the primary engine of partnerships in elven culture, but the emotional dimension matters too. Elven society prizes stoicism, and even friendships tend to be relatively devoid of emotional discussions and honesty (though there are certainly exceptions, especially in recent years). The one relationship in which an elf can be genuinely honest about their feelings is with a romantic partner. As a result, romantic relationships for elves involve a great deal of trust and vulnerability that they cannot necessarily experience elsewhere. The effect of this is twofold: (1) romantic relationships are especially prized and universally expected, even to the point that aromantic elves are left out of the social freedoms afforded by romantic relationship--hence the importance of friendships to aromantic elves--and (2) keeping a romantic partner with whom an elf can share trust and vulnerability even after their intellectual bond has faded is rewarding and highly valuable. For elves, a romantic relationship is an emotional sanctuary that is not taken for granted. Romantic relationships with any gender are encouraged, as is open acceptance of those relationships.
Sexual matters are another story entirely. For elves, there is no perceived connection between romance and sex whatsoever. In fact, elves generally believe that sexual relationships can cloud the mind and feelings when it comes to romance, and it is generally believed in elven society that sex with a romantic partner should be avoided. (This belief is slowly changing thanks to the influence of other groups' beliefs since the dissolution of the kingdoms, but change takes an especially long time in elven society.) Instead, elven seek sexual relationships based on other characteristics than romantic connection. The most common of these characteristics is perceived beauty, which is of course highly subjective--elves take great pride in their appearance and try to attract sexual partners through things like personal style and largely ignore things like physical appearance, though this too can be a factor. Other factors include personality (sex with close friends is highly common among elves), social rank, and artistic ability (which is closely associated with sexual prowess among elves). Beyond this, group sex is especially prevalent in elven society, and a common pursuit in elven society is trying to build the perfect group. Elves view sex as natural and enriching, though not on the level of some other groups; nevertheless, asexual elves tend to be ostracized for "not understanding" the beauty of sexual contact. (This too is beginning to change; contact with the gnomes has led elves to reevaluate their beliefs about asexuality in slow but steady ways.) Homosexuality and pansexuality are perceived by elves to be natural, and rejection of that notion is seen as moral inferiority.
Half-elves:
(It is worth noting that half-elves usually accept the societal
expectations of those they partner with; when they choose an elven or
Faninite partner, they often adopt those cultural practices--these
guidelines are for what half-elves generally choose for themselves,
especially in relationships with other half-elves.) Due to half-elves' status as social outcasts among their parent groups (elves and Faninites), they approach building families cautiously, as they know their children will be perceived as outsiders too. By and large, this means that half-elves often opt not to have children at all. So rather than romantic and sexual relationships being the foundation for building a family unit, those relationships exist solely for the benefit of the half-elves involved. For this reason, half-elves go beyond their normal trend of combining the finest points of elven and Faninite culture--instead, they have developed a fairly unique system of relationship-building of their own. For a half-elf, romance is more than an intellectual connection like the elves' relationships, and it is also more than a family-building practice like the Faninites'; rather, half-elves choose to essentially serve their partner(s). The model of a half-elven relationship is to promise to care for their partner(s) if their partner(s) will serve them. "Your needs are my needs" is a common saying in half-elven relationships, which reflects the exchange being made in their bond. As the use of the (s) on "partner(s)" indicates, half-elves do sometimes borrow the elven tendency toward multiple partners, but without the ranking--they effective form communes in their relationships where everyone involved is obligated to the needs of everyone else. Polyamory is not the rule among half-elves, but it is certainly common.
In terms of romance, half-elves channel their sense of being misunderstood by the world at large into a feeling of isolation, and the feeling of being understood by another half-elf who can identify with their struggle forms a deep connection. Half-elves form a sort of "us against the world" mentality in their relationships, which makes them especially committed to the success of those relationships. Half-elves fall in love almost as deeply as halflings, but with far greater ease and rapidity; it is not uncommon for half-elves to fully commit themselves to a partner (via marriage or other formal means) in the space of months or even weeks. To outsiders, this may look like hastiness, but the success rate of half-elven relationships is higher than most groups'--the intense bond they share is enough to hold them together with firm and reliable binding. The actual emotional connection between half-elves is characterized by very openly affectionate communication (many other groups are shocked by the willingness of half-elves to speak emotionally about their love) and a fierce protectiveness of their partner(s). Half-elves, like their elven progenitors, are quite full in embracing homosexuality and pansexuality, and half-elven relationships are broadly very diverse in this regard.
Like both the Faninites and elves that created them, half-elves do not directly tie sex to romance. But there is a nuance to their approach that complicates it beyond directly adopting their progenitors' beliefs--half-elves do believe that romance is not necessary for sex, but they do generally accept the idea that romance can be an important element of sex, potentially heightening the experience beyond a physical pleasure. It would be inaccurate to say that half-elves only engage in sexual relationships with partners they are romantically invested in, but more half-elves choose to have sexual contact with romantic partners than not. This is to say that half-elves depart quite radically from their parent groups and instead adopt something unlike any other group in Evanoch. And while romantic arrangements for half-elves are often polyamorous, they rarely engage in group sex. It is not frowned upon, nor is it unheard of; half-elves simply prefer to have a one-to-one emotional connection with sexual partners. It is widely observed that half-elves are the trendsetters of Evanoch--their approaches to nearly all things in life become the most widely adopted norm by travelers and nomads--and this idea too has gained purchase with Evanines across the continent: the notion that romance heightens a sexual relationship rather than being necessary or unrelated is spreading across the land.
There you have it: a fairly detailed guide to romantic and sexual relationships in my homebrew setting. One thing I definitely learned in the course of writing this was that I have written enough about the different cultural groups in my setting that it felt less like coming up with details about their relationships and more like using my existing understanding to infer what they would think given the other information I've already written. I guess that's another key takeaway about developing your homebrew setting--it gets easier over time. The more you develop, the more you have to draw on, the less work you have to do to fill in the gaps. If you had asked me to write this guide (which focuses on a pretty specific idea) when I had only made my basic homebrew setting profile, I would have been utterly lost. But with time, patience, and consistent effort, this came naturally. So keep at it, homebrewers--you'll get to the point where you can intuit anything you need to know about your world right off the top of your head.
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