Non-Human Age Calculator

One of the interesting things about D&D's races is that each has a different lifespan. In practical terms, this means that each race would view life and death in different ways. The cultural beliefs around death should vary by race in your homebrew world to reflect this. But this variance in age creates an obstacle to understanding. How old, really, is a 200-year-old elf? Or a 200-year-old dwarf? I've developed a simple calculator that translates all the D&D 3.5 and 5e races into equivalent human years for easy reference.  

The blank calculator, showing all the basic races.

Using the calculator is easy. First, open the spreadsheet, then click File -> Make a Copy -> Make a Copy (once you have decided how to save the spreadsheet). If you're translating a non-human age to a human age, use the left side of the calculator. When you enter a number there, it runs that number through a conversion equal to the proportion assigned in the Player's Handbook 3.5. Then, under "Human Age," the converted age appears. Conversely, if you know the human age your non-human character would be and need the non-human equivalent, use the right side of the calculator. Plug in the human age on the appropriate line for the race you're converting to, and the 0 you see above will become the translated age for the race. 

The calculator filled with a sample age for all races, which shows the converted human ages. The opposite side of the calculator works the same way. 

Even though this tool allows you to describe character ages precisely in an in-game way, it's still helpful to translate from these other races' ages into human equivalents for your players. In the same way that my players get lost when I describe my changes to days of the week and months of the year, describing an elf as 371 years old can mean very little to the average player. My recommendation is to give both parts of the information, which both informs the player of the appropriate details and slowly teaches them to understand the age scale. That looks like this: "You see a halfling woman dressed in a loose blue dress; she looks to be in her early seventies, which is about 50 in human years." This approach is simple, to the point, and unobtrusive narratively; you give the details needed for understanding and continue to the stuff that matters to your story. And go forward with this tool, now easily able to describe character ages in a way that's easier for everyone to understand. 

That's all for now. Coming soon: a one-shot based on Monty Python and the Holy Grail, architecture by D&D race, and a list of custom classes. Until next time, happy gaming!

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